I’m moving! I got my own domain! 🙂

Please update your links and visit me HERE from now on!

Millions of thanks to:

• Uzyn for hosting my new site
• Weichiang for being my technical consultant
• Sabrina for helping with some of the codes

Pingsters, please re-love my blog, okay? Haha… Thank you for loving me! 😛

I completely hate and despise ‘photographers’ who claim that they go for “model shoots” to practise taking portraits and how to shoot people. I despise them.

Such model shoots are there solely for 2 purposes:

1. For male photographers to go and gawk at nubile bodies
2. For attention-seeking ‘models’ to indulge in their own narcissistic desires

There isn’t any real emotion in this photo, nor any artistic value, only that the girl is prettier (more photogenic) than the average girl you pick off the street. Big deal.

You may argue that it’s only for practise, and they practice better under certain conditions. And that they have to practise so that they can take professional shoots of professional models and celebrities and what nots, in future. Alright, then please answer the following question, my dear friends:

1. Do you think these ‘photographers’ would consider taking photos if the ‘model’ turned up in a nun’s garb?
2. How many of these ‘photographers’ will actually go into this line full time in future, ala Russell Wong and Kid Chan?

Chances are, the answer is none, for both questions. They are only using the name of such portrait photographers so as to be able to gawk at those ‘models’. It’s all about the sex factor, isn’t it? Pathetic, really.

I don’t think Kid Chan became who he was by taking such shots.

A true photographer does not only take photos of pretty faces. He would take photos of real people, who have real emotions on their faces, in real settings. Okay, so you may argue, but conditions in a studio are different. The lightings, the mood, etc. Yes yes, you’re right. But why don’t I see you taking photos of old men who have had difficult years and lines etched into their faces to show it? Why don’t I see you taking photos of middle aged women who have slightly sagging breasts and whose soft round bodies tell you, I have had kids and whose smile says, It’s been hard bringing them up but I love my kids?

I’m sure they would make great subjects, too. But nope, it’s all about the sex, isn’t it?

I hate to break it to all you pathetic photographer-wannabes out there, but having a pretty face in a photo does not make it a fabulous photo. It does not make you a photographer either.

And btw, girls, being photogenic also does not make you a ‘model’. The really beautiful ones would never subject themselves to such ‘photoshoots’ because they don’t need to prove to anyone that they are beautiful.

Besides, have all you amateur ‘models’ out there ever thought of what these male ‘photographers’ do with your photos? Unlike celebrity models who have managers and agents, you have no rights to those photos, and you will never know what kind of abuse it is subjected to. Maybe it will be posted on some sex-themed site for more guys to gawk at? Like sgGirls? Or worse, these pathetic ‘photographers’ masturbate to it, maybe?

Have some dignity, won’t you.

I’m so frustrated! I’ve been applying for a position at the Careers@NTUC website, and it keeps timing out or dying on me! I have filled the same form up 3 freaking times, and I’ve given up!

I shall do it another day when my mood is better.

This weekend has been a waste of my time. I have yet to do anything productive – my Law project seems to be on a standstill. It’s so stagnant that if it were water, aedes mosquito could breed in it. Boo.

Feeling super frustrated now. I cannot wait to finish up my course and move on to the next step in my life. At this point in time, I’m not quite sure what that is, but it’s alright because I always believe that things will smoothen out somehow.

I’ve been contemplating going to Australia to study Industrial Relations. But things are very unconfirmed at the moment, because I have to await the university’s reply on the module exemptions matter. It’s all just one big long wait. Frustrating.

So my back up plan is to go ahead and apply for a job at NTUC as Industrial Relations Officer, and hope that I get an interview and a chance. But at the moment, the website keeps showing me error messages, so I am going to KIV until I feel like filling in forms again!

I also want to say thank you to all my friends and the Pingsters who have been leaving messages on my blog, and sending me virtual hugs. It means a lot to me at this moment, and I’m just glad that I have friends who are standing by me.

Hmm! Other than that. My mom is away visiting my dad in Indonesia! OK! I don’t have a dysfunctional family okay, we are together! We exist in the world of emails. Haha.

I’m happy when I’m alone, but after eating frozen food for a while, after having no one to talk to when I get home, after having to walk home late at night from the bus stop, and after having to clean up after myself, I usually start missing my mom. Haha!

I don’t understand people who stroll into class after half the lesson is already over, then ask me for my notes and expect me to spend my break time explaining all the concepts that the lecturer went through.

I don’t understand people who don’t want to start early on their own projects, then ask me (when they finally realise it is time to start panicking) to let them take a look at my project so that they have an idea on how to start writing theirs.

I don’t understand people who don’t take notes during classes, and at the end of the lesson, ask me if I could send a copy of all the notes that I took down on my laptop.

I don’t understand people who even need to copy what I highlight on my lecture notes. I don’t understand people who actually feel that it’s actually okay to ask me if I can help them photostat a copy of my textbook (additional readings) which I took the effort to get from the library or from friends in other schools. I don’t understand people who ask me questions like, “How do you study ah?” Erm. I read. And then I think about the stuff that I’ve read.

At the risk of getting flamed, I still want to say that I find the most insufferable people to be those who lack intelligence and still don’t put in the effort. Not all people are born equal, of course, but those who are stupid should put in more effort.

I no longer mourn the loss of that relationship. I am happy and well now. It took me a month – a whole month. But I’m well now. I have been surrounding myself with new things, new people. I have been engaging in new activities and learning about new things, reading new books.

I had good and bad memories and I learnt things about love, life and relationships. I saw new places and experienced new cultures. I made new friends (Gerald, Justin and Jindong). I ate new things and had new favourites. I was encouraged to pursue my dreams and I got the courage to take bold steps. I gained a lot, in fact.

Yet, I didn’t lose a friend, I didn’t lose a boyfriend, I didn’t lose a partner.

The only thing I lost was… Time.

This requires a lot of ‘preparations’ beforehand, and some coordination and good luck. So please bear with me if you don’t find that my method works for you! Hehe.

1. Morning breakfast at McDonalds – redeem a McMuffin or Filet O Fish using the points that you have earned on your EZ Link / Macs membership

2. Armed with your laptop, head to the library nearest to you, and enjoy free surfing with Wireless@SG as long as you like. Pick up any books to loan with your library card. It’s free! (It’s called your NRIC card, silly)

3. Redeem a free facial or spa or massage with a voucher that you got from a magazine or contest joined. Some banks’ new credit cards sign ups also reward new customers with massage/spa vouchers. I love massages the most! Always feel very happy after getting one! Hehe.

4. Redeem free lunch from points accumulated for riding on buses and MRTs using your EZ Link card (SBS’ Ride & Redeem Scheme)! For example, 100 Transit Dollars for a Loy Kee Best Chicken Rice Special Set.

5. Redeem a free movie ticket with one of the movie tickets from a stack that you got from working as a part-time staff for Singtel’s Wireless@SG (haha) – I’m going to watch Hairspray!

6. Get a free hair cut at some hairdressing academy (Toni & Guy, etc)

7. Pay for any transport using EZ Link card (preferably not your own) Haha! Otherwise, if you’re living in the west, you can shuttle between IMM and Jurong East, Clementi or Boon Lay using the free shuttle bus 🙂

There you go! Free day out (okay lah, don’t count the transport part. I said cashless, not completely free). Haha!

And I officially declare this hiatus over, until the next time I feel like I need another break from life.

Well, not to say that I’ve recovered from the last erm, break. But I just felt like maybe I should write something here. I’ve been busy with school, with reading (at least 3 books a week), and with the 3 tuition students that I have now.

I’m now committing about 15 hours of my weekly schedule to giving tuition – that’s like holding 1/3 of a job, in addition to studying full time. I have two Korean boys (Primary 2 and 4) and they are siblings, so I teach 3 hours in one sitting. It’s no mean feat, especially when they are boys who have really short attention spans. Well, it’s that, or they are just constantly trying to annoy me with their neverending questions, or their absurd answers.

Examples from yesterday’s lessons:

Question asked by student: “Why is it called a nursery and not a doctory?”

Answer to sentence construction exercises:
1. I need some soil, seeds, and a pot to plant flowers.
2. I need one thousand books, two hundred pens and one million erasers to draw one picture.

*breathe, Daphne, breathe*

Boys are just so naughty. But these 2 boys of mine are also extremely adorable! So I forgive them. Haha. They are from Seoul, Korea, but went to Shenzhen, China, and study in an international school there for about 2 years, before coming to Singapore. Therefore, they are really outspoken, and actually speak good English, with a slight American slang.

My other student is a Korean lady who has a PhD in Korean musicology (or something equally amazing). She is here with her husband, who is pursuing some doctorate course at NUS. So meanwhile, she is studying some post-doctorate course at NIE in Asian musicology. And that’s where I come in. I help her with her academic English (thesis-writing language, in other words).

Anyway, we’ve settled into a comfortable routine now, of alternating between lessons in academic English, and discussive sessions, whereby we just sit for 2 hours to talk about world issues (economic, political, international relations, globalisation, etc.) and social issues (racial discriminations, social stigmas, women’s rights, education systems’ impact on the youth, etc). I must say that I really enjoy lessons with her. I learn as much from these lessons as she does. Hmm, so does that mean we should not have any payment of sorts? Haha, actually I feel a bit bad because this is something that comes naturally to me – academic writing and speaking the language – and yet I charge so much for the lessons, when it doesn’t even require much effort on my part.

Seriously, who pays a tutor so much money to come and sit in her house (and even get served drinks and snacks) just to talk about topics of interest, or newspaper articles? Umm.

In any case, I do feel very happy about the way the lessons are going now, for all my students. Although I’m very tired, and I actually have to study my school stuff on the bus, while travelling home to JB, or on the MRT, or during meal times, I feel like I’m actually doing something real, instead of just studying and studying and studying.

Well, the drawbacks (besides that I’m perpetually tired) are that I don’t have time for friends or family now, and I’ve started speaking “funnily”. I tend to put on an accent when I speak now, because my students don’t understand me if I speak with the Singapore English accent (yes, I tried). And since my students are the only people I speak to these days, sometimes it gets kind of hard to break out of the habit of putting on an accent. So please don’t be overly surprised if you see me one day, and I start slang-ing. Haha. BTW why is it called slang-ing? By definition,

Slang: Informal usage of vocabulary and idioms
Accent: A distinctive characteristic pronunciation determined by regional or social background of the speaker

I guess, in Singlish, to slang means to put on an accent? Odd.

by e.e. cummings

i carry your heart with me (i carry it in
my heart) i am never without it (anywhere
i go you go, my dear; and whatever is done
by only me is your doing, my darling)

i fear
no fate (for you are my fate, my sweet) i want
no world (for beautiful you are my world, my true)
and it’s you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you

here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life; which grows
higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that’s keeping the stars apart

i carry your heart (i carry it in my heart)

I am going on a hiatus. Because I cannot handle my life. Because I don’t want to face those things any more. Do you know how much I fear waking up each morning? Do you know how I try to occupy my own thoughts so that they are not overwhelmed by negative thoughts.

I’m going on a hiatus on this blog, on Ping, on Twitter.

I’m sorry if I don’t reply. Maybe I just can’t bring myself to do it. I am lost, I am hurt, and I need time.

I need a one way ticket to Africa, or death, which ever is nearer.

Daphne: Mmmm.. The banana chocolate cake from Secret Recipe is yummilicious… It’s really heavenly, you know? Mmmm…

Yesterday, after my seminar in school (Organisational Effectiveness Study and Employee Loyalty, Commitment, and Career Planning), I headed off to Orchard to meet the Pingsters for dinner at Secret Recipe at Forum.

I really didn’t know where Forum was, so I had to ask Xiangying via SMS. Haha. She told me it’s next to Hilton. I was stunned for a while, thinking, “Now, where is Hilton?!” Haha. Finally found it, thanks to some kind souls and a map outside Liat Towers. Hoho.

Was making my way there when Paced called – she was already there! I met her there (we were earliest, yay!) and we started talking about doughnuts and wireless and er… I can’t remember what else. But what I do remember though, is how quickly we warmed up to each other, just like old friends – although yesterday was the first time we met! Haha…

Brennan and Arzhou arrived (separately) soon after, and then Jzin. Poor Jzin had to rush through his dinner, and go back to work, before coming back to join us again after 9pm. Anyways. People started trickling in one by one. Aaron, Sekling & Uzyn, Sabrina, DJLamb, NTT…

Was very happy to see Sekling! She just started her first day at work, at SCB, and I feel like I haven’t seen her for ages! Although in reality it was just a month ago that we met up, at the Ping.sg anniversary party. Wait. It’s only been a month?! It feels like aeons ago! My gosh. Haha. I’ve been to a couple of other meet ups since the party – Hajah Maimunah dinner, and the Miss Clarity Cafe lunch.

Anyway, new faces today were Paced, Aaron, Sabrina, DJLamb. Very happy to meet all of them! Though I kind of didn’t talk to Aaron, Sabrina, and DJLamb. Haha. I’m not very good at splitting my attention amongst so many people. Well, next time then!

We started ordering our food (with the really confused waiter). And then Brennan wanted to order a whole cake (the banana chocolate cake) but the cafe staff said that if he ordered (and paid) for it now, he would have to hold on to the cake, as they cannot keep it in the fridge for him. What?! That means the cake would be melted by the time he was ready to go!

Seriously, this is called bad customer service, and no-sense for business at all. Tsk.

Anyway. Here’s what I had yesterday evening:

Pan-Grilled Dory with Lobster Sauce

Banana Chocolate Cake!

The fish was really good, you know? I enjoyed it – every bite of it. The dory was grilled just right, and there was a buttery richness, topped off with the creamy lobster sauce (which I’m convinced doesn’t contain an ounce of lobster but still tasted wonderful nonetheless). And of course, the cake. Yums. Rich, creamy. I prefer a heavier brownie cake though. But still, it’s hard not to like this cake. Wish I had more space to stuff down some cheese cake as well, but alas, there was only so much that my tummy could take – albeit it was my first meal of the day. Haha.

Okay! Photo with my girls!

One of my best girl friends – Sekling and I

Pretty pretty new friend – Paced and I

And more photos! (Courtesy of Arzhou.com)

Arzhou debunks the Minesweeper Myth

From L to R: Jzin, Aaron, Uzyn, Arzhou, Brennan

Sabrina and DJLamb

Sekling and I

Thereafter, DK arrived, and we all adjourned to McDonald’s! Haha! DK was actually in class, and he was being lured to Secret Recipe by us our Twitters about the food and the ongoings at the gathering:

Daphne: Mmmm.. The banana chocolate cake from Secret Recipe is yummilicious… It’s really heavenly, you know? Mmmm…

Arzhou: @dk come to the outing (wah very blatant and straightforward!)

Arzhou: @tstar the choc banana cake is very nice

Daphne: Brennan the Digital Terrorist needs to read Voxy to destress. Do you? (bwahahahaha, we extracted a confession from the DT!)

Paced being disgusted amused by DK

And Jzin trying to be Voxy trying to act cute

I left soon after, so I don’t know what else happened. But it was a very fruitful and successful (smaller) gathering. I really was able to take my mind off certain issues, at least for a while, and I was able to eat properly!

Ah, okay, and something vain… I wore a new dress today, and forgot to take a picture of it. So I set my HP camera to self-timer, and voila!

Dress – $21 from C.O.A.X.
Belt – $11 from Aries
Bag – Price unknown from Chanel

Anyway. Stay tuned to the Ping.sg forum for more announcements for gatherings!

If you’re reading this, and you are not from Ping.sg, join us! We’re really easygoing and we just have so much fun meeting new people each time 🙂 We don’t bite either. Haha!

Click here for Arzhou’s entry on the gathering.